People have fairly polarized opinions when it comes to having sex during pregnancy. As a father-to-be, the desire for an active, satisfying sex life is countered by the uncomfortable myths and fears surrounding the idea of sex while pregnant. Of course, the decision about whether or not you'll be having sex with your pregnant mate isn't purely yours to make – your partner will have the ultimate say about how things play out between the sheets. However, providing that both of your are feeling frisky, the simple fact is that in most instances, sex is not only safe, but natural and healthy as well.
Exceptions to the Rule
Before talking about the fact that sex is safe in a “normal” pregnancy, it makes sense to preface this explanation with a quick summary of the things that would indicate that sex shouldn't be entered into without the consultation of an OB-GYN. Times when extra precautions should be taken include when there is a history of miscarriages, an increased risk of pre-term labor, multiple birth pregnancies, a weak cervix and after any spotting or bleeding. These are all indicators that there are heightened risk factors at the moment and the need for simple satisfaction should never compromise the safety of mother or child.
Now, the Good News
Now that we've handled all of the precautionary statements, here's a bit of good news: despite the extra weight and the stretch marks and the other traumatic aspects of the pregnancy that your lover is currently suffering through, the chances are high that she's still interested in sex. As a matter of fact, many of the hormones and natural body responses to orgasm can be highly beneficial for pregnant women. Pay careful attention to her cues and clues and opt for positions that prevent too much wear and tear on the cervical wall. Spooning is often a popular position among pregnant women.
Can Doesn't Equal Will
As a parent-to-be, it's critical that you understand that just because your mate CAN have sex with you doesn't necessarily mean that she wants to. Pregnancy entails a veritable hormonal roller coaster, and sex can rank either very high or very low on the scale of importance, depending on serious factors as well as silly factors like how much ice cream is left in the freezer right now. Work hard to make life as stress-free as you possibly can. Rub her back and feet, rub her belly with lotion, take time and effort to invest in pampering her when she's tired and bloated and nauseated and not entirely in love with her new, pregnant body.
More Bad News
Unfortunately, we need to close with a less than desirable tidbit. If your mate's OB-GYN says that sex is off limits, you can't use the loose definition of sex. This doesn't mean just sexual intercourse, but anything that leads to heightened sexual arousal and/or orgasm! Sorry, fellas...